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Archive for September, 2013

We’ve been talking all month about attitude. Have you heard the term before that we should “adopt an attitude of gratitude”? I’ve given this a lot of thought, as I have one foot in one world and one foot in another world, right now.

I’m not where I want to be, fully where my passion lies, and I feel as if the transition is going much slower than I would like. At the same time, I recognize how crucial it is for me to remain in gratitude for where I’m starting from and all the blessings and benefits I’ve received — and continue to receive — at the same time that I am working to remove myself from it.

I encourage you to spend some time with your journal today, writing about your gratitude for the lessons you’ve learned from failures, from the people in your life — past and present, and for what you have learned this month during our study on attitude.

If you embrace life’s challenges with a great attitude, what will that mean for you and for those around you?

What will be the outcome of your life and attitude if you maintain a positive attitude, versus how it might be if you don’t.

If you really take the time to go through this exercise, it will be sobering…I promise!

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We all know someone who is currently having a hard time with some aspect of their life. Spend some time today thinking about someone specific who is in this situation…discouraged due to difficulties they face.

Ask them how they are doing. Spend some time and energy in encouraging them in their areas of strength, giftedness, and passion.

If you have the opportunity, encourage them by sharing one of your stories about a tough time you went through and the lessons you learned as a result.

I know, it makes us feel better to share stories of our successes, but the truth is, we learn more from others when they share stories about the times they have stumbled and how they worked through whatever it was. Those are the times we discover what we are truly made of, what we are capable of, and learn the lessons that will help us move forward.

Afterwards, spend some time with your journal and write down some thoughts from your conversation. Write down how it felt before, during, and after.

Write about the impact you were able to have on the other person.

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A colleague of mine and his wife, Jeff and Kerry, are expecting their first child, a boy. The excitement they share as they anticipate this event is palpable. When they talk about doctor appointments, preparations, things they’ve purchased, and preparing the nursery, you can feel their positive energy and they glow with eager anticipation.

Shift now, to your organization. What happens in preparation for a new employee? Having been the new employee in a number of different organizations over the course of my career, I can say my experience has been varied, but only a couple of places stand out for doing it well; one of them was significantly more prepared than any other.

A couple of days after I accepted the offer at this particular company, I received a very nice flower arrangement; this was a first! A couple of days after that, my new manager called to express how pleased he was that I was joining his team, and to check on a couple of details; he wanted to know what I wanted printed on my business cards and needed some information that would allow the IT group to set up the laptop they ordered for me. This, too, was surprising behavior.

When I arrived for my first day, my office had been freshly cleaned and was as well appointed as they could make it; they wanted me to choose the furniture set-up I preferred rather than guessing, so for a couple of weeks I made do with the large, ornately carved wooden desk that formerly belonged to the company’s President! My phone was set up and the desk actually had pens, paper, stapler, tape dispenser, phone book, and company phone directory, as well as a company-branded pen & tablet and travel coffee cup.

My new teammates had each written a welcome note on brightly-colored 3×5 cards, which were tacked to the wall above my desk.  The admin assistant had already scheduled “getting to know you meetings” with all of the key leaders with whom I would be working closely, and those were spaced out over the first two weeks. They had lunch brought in for me on my first day, and we all ate together, beginning to get acquainted.

I’m sure there are other details I could share with you, but my point is this: My entry into the company was very positive and left me with no doubt about their level of excitement that I was joining them. They took the time to think through and plan for my arrival; none of it was an afterthought. The same can be said for my colleague and his wife as they prepare for the arrival of their son.

Contrast this to my first day with another company; my manager was actually on vacation the first couple of days I was there! I had office space, but nothing set up for me…no office supplies, no computer, no plan for how I would spend my time beyond the obligatory stack of documents that I had to complete. Why wouldn’t she have scheduled my first days for a time when she would actually be there? I’m still at a loss for the explanation for that. Or consider the stories I’ve heard – and I’m sure you’ve heard, or perhaps even experienced yourself – about companies that behaved as if the arrival of a new employee was a surprise, an inconvenience, maybe even an irritation.

Going back to my colleague’s son. No doubt, the baby will feel welcomed, wanted, and loved when he arrives and as he grows up. Intuitively he will know these things, but it won’t be for several years that he will have a conscious understanding of the time, effort, and thoughtfulness that his parents invested in preparing for his arrival. New employees, on the other hand, are instantly very much aware of the level of thoughtfulness and consideration that went into preparing for their arrival – or didn’t, as the case often seems to be.

I hope you don’t get caught up in the analogy I chose; it’s not my intent to imply that employees are “babies” and should be treated as such. Rather, it was a timely (for me) thought-provoking situation that got me thinking about how we often view our work entirely differently than we do other aspects of our lives, and yet, that are so many parallels and great lessons to be learned if we will only change our paradigm.

Whatever end of the spectrum you are on with respect to preparing for new employees, what message does your practice send?

Is it the message you intend to send?

What impact is it having on employee engagement and morale in your organization?

And how is that, in turn, affecting your results?

If you are interested in benefiting from your employees’ discretionary efforts (that level of performance that is above and beyond the basics as defined in one’s job description), taking some time to reflect on – and perhaps adjust – your new employee on-boarding preparation and processes may serve you well.

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Today, we’re going to spend a little more time on the topic we jumped into yesterday. Get out your journal, and list three benefits or lessons you learned from the two experiences you thought about yesterday.

First, what was the failure in your personal life?

Benefits or Lessons Learned:

1

2

3

What was the failure in your professional life?

Benefits or Lessons Learned:

1

2

3

Now that you are clear on the lessons in each of those situations, what can you (or maybe you already are) do differently going forward to face similar situations differently, and to realize a better outcome?

How does your attitude play into what will happen in the future?

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This last week of month 9, we are going to focus on the power of your attitude. As Thomas Jefferson once observed,

Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.

Are you familiar with the story of Christopher Gardner? If you’ve seen the movie, The Pursuit of Happyness, you will recognize it. Gardner lost it all — his wife, his home, and family savings in a bad business investment. He was living on the streets with his son when he entered a competitive stock broker internship program, which, by the way, offered no pay for six months. Determined to prove himself and provide his son a good quality of life, we went on to become  a top performer for Bear Stearns, and eventually opened his own firm with offices in New York, Chicago, and San Francisco. He also has become a motivational speaker and philanthropist who has received numerous humanitarian awards.

Imagine what would have happened to him and his son if he had given up when he found himself on the street. We read the stories every day, and there are numerous possible outcomes to this kind of story, and few of them are good. Had he adopted a negative attitude, not only would his and his son’s lives be very different, but so would the lives of the many people he’s helped since he dusted himself off and got to work.*

I know we don’t like to spend a lot of time in consideration of the times when we’ve failed, but they are gems in terms of lessons learned. Spend some time today considering a failure you’ve experienced in your personal life and in your professional life. Describe them.

What attitude did you take in response to these failures?

What happened as a result?

Looking back on it now, how would you say your attitude served you?

 

*From Intentional Leadership by Giant Impact. 

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Good morning! It’s Friday. Does that change your attitude toward your day?

For some, it really does because they know they are at the weekend. In some ways, I find that sad and a bit disheartening. What it says to me is that at some level there is something (maybe a little or maybe a lot) about how people spend their time Monday-Friday that is dissatisfying for them…that they are just putting in their time until they get to the weekend.

I’ll admit I do enjoy the weekends – more unstructured time and time with my family. At the same time, I look forward to the coming week because that seems to be a more likely time for more activity in connecting with and adding value to others.

only 20% of people have the opportunity to do what they do best every day.

I read a disturbing bit of research yesterday, from Gallup, stating that out of some comprehensive research (1.7 million respondents) only 20% of people have the opportunity to do what they do best every day. Only 20%! WOW! That’s a piece of information that should make business leaders stand up and take notice. No wonder so many just put in their time, longing for the start of the weekend!

So, what to do with this weekend? My usual activities continue — some writing, some reading, some prep for a lesson I have coming up on Attitude (how fitting for this month!), some prep for the next Empowerment Mentoring lesson on Perception. I’m working on being more disciplined in several areas of my life, and that work does not get a “pass” on the weekend. Family time, of course.

I also have some commitments to follow up on, as I’ve just started working with a new Coach, and need to keep myself on track with that work.

What will you do this weekend? Are you in the habit, by now, of thoughtfully preparing for your weekend?

I’m not suggesting your time needs to be fully structured and busy…merely thoughtfully considered and intentionally spent. Approaching it this way (well, not just the weekends, but all your time, actually) will put you on the path that will allow you more likelihood of achieving the results you desire for your life.

Give a little thought today, if you haven’t already, to whom you need to spend time with this weekend.

What you need to invest your time and energy in over the weekend?

What do you need to do to care for and nurture yourself this weekend?

What do you need to do to set yourself up for success on Monday and in the coming weeks?

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Good morning and Happy Thursday!

Time to get your journals out. Today, spend some time writing about what choices you need to make regarding a challenge or decision that you are currently facing.

Envision the obstacles you might face on your journey. Write them out.

Imagine how you will overcome those obstacles. Do this with the belief you are creative, resourceful, and whole; truly the only thing standing in your way is you…and any perceived obstacles can be defeated!

Now, spend some time putting together an action plan with specific measurable steps. Map it out in your calendar, and block out whatever time is necessary to do the work.

Find an accountability partner if it will help you stay on track.

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Let’s focus on others for a bit. Take some time today to notice others who demonstrate a positive attitude and acknowledge it. At the end of the day, send a personal note (hand-written would be much more powerful, but email would suffice, if you must!) to the one person whose attitude stood out the most.

At the end of the day, answer these questions:

How did it make you feel when you went the extra mile to recognize people with a positive attitude?

How do you think it made them feel, especially the person who received your note?

Do you think they will be more likely to display the same kind of attitude more often around you and others? Why?

When you are int he midst of difficult circumstances, do you think making small positive choices such as recognizing others’ attitudes will make a difference in your own life?

I’m certainly not perfect in this area; like most people, there are times when life gets to me, and it’s reflected in my attitude and demeanor. I try to catch myself and make an adjustment quickly, as I know it’s my choice. I try to be mindful throughout the day that my attitude has the potential of making or crashing someone else’s day, and I’d much prefer to be well thought of when I’ve taken my leave…which means to me I need to focus on and demonstrate a positive attitude. I have to say, that on those occasions I grudgingly have pushed myself to adjust and do or say something nice, I’ve immediately felt better for the effort.

Let me know how it works for you.

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What’s going on in your life and/or work right now that you know you need to deal with, but your actions might be interpreted as preferring to ignore reality?

Get your journal out and briefly describe the situation and the challenge you face.

Dig deep and come to terms with why you don’t want to address the issue…Write it out.

Describe what could happen if you address the issue.

What impact might it have on your life? The lives of those around you? Your team? Your Organization?

Describe what can happen if you choose to not address the issue.

What are the risks, implications, consequences of not acting?

What action steps can you take in order to bring resolution to this challenge?

What would happen in your life if you consistently made choices to address issues like this?

How would that affect your attitude when you face similar situations/challenges in the future?

For me, there’s a level of satisfaction in addressing the things I don’t want to address but know that I need to. I don’t mean to confuse this with pleasure — as it isn’t necessarily fun, but there is satisfaction in tackling the hard and sometimes unpleasant stuff.

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If you’ve been in any kind of leadership role, and I suspect you have — or aspire to, since you’re reading this blog — you know what it feels like to be doubted, assaulted, ridiculed. You’ve likely faced embarrassing moments, ridicule…had your decisions and judgment questioned by others.

The question is, how do you respond? And, I do me an”respond” — meaning thoughtfully, intentionally choosing what you will do or say, rather than reacting, which is immediate, emotional, and usually thoughtless. The point is, you get to choose your attitude during these trying times.

Consider one who has gone before us…

President Truman faced his share of doubt, rejection, and failure…let’s consider his story for a few moments:

When he first proposed to his girlfriend, Bess, Wallace, she rejected him. He pursued her, anyway, and eight years later they married.

He was rejected when he tried to join the Army because his eyesight was poor. Refusing to be kept from serving his country, he memorized the eye chart so he could pass the test! He later won distinction for courageous leadership in battle.

After WWI, his business failed. He moved into a career in public service, as a judge and later was elected to the US Senate.

Although he was considered unfit to be a US President, he successfully led us through the end of WWI; he is now regarded as one of the greatest presidents!

Expected to lose the 1948 election, newspaper printed that his opponent, Thomas Dewey, had won! Imagined Truman’s delight in their misprint the next morning!

If you stay the course, and I hope you do, you will go through these trying times, over and over. You will have to filter and choose the messages you will listen to and the stories you believe. You will have the opportunity, several times a day, to choose your attitude. I hope you choose well.

Spend some time in reflection today: How do you deal with assaults on your attitude?

Describe a time when you felt as if your attitude was under attack. How did you respond?

What did you learn?

What would you do differently today, as a result?

How can your choices influence your attitude?

How can your attitude influence your choices?

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