Posts Tagged ‘Life Plan’

How long will it take?

That’s the point in the conversation when it becomes painfully obvious, to me, at least, that the person in front of me truly isn’t ready to initiate change in her/his life. That’s the point when I realize the person in front of me is looking for the quick fix, the easy out — you know, the path that won’t take him/her out of her comfort zone. Because while this person recognizes something isn’t working in his/her life, and is aware of the lack of congruence — even if he/she cannot articulate it as such — she/he is not uncomfortable enough, yet, to make a change.

One of my mentors shared a story with me a few years ago, when we were talking about pursuing dreams. He said he often stops by the Rosetta Stone kiosk in an airport he frequently flies thru, and considers purchasing a module. But, then he finds himself tempted to ask the salesperson how long it will take to learn the language, and mid-way through that thought, he knows he’s not passionate enough about it to give it what it would require to succeed. He thinks of it as negotiating terms and pursuing dreams doesn’t work that way.

It’s a similar principle with prospective clients who understand something isn’t working in their life, their organization, within their team, and they know they need to do something different. If I believe I have value to add and a potential solution, I offer it, and then we have what I think of as the (no disrespect intended in any way, shape, or form) “come to Jesus” moment: What are you willing to do differently to initiate and see this change through?

What are you willing to do differently to initiate and see this change through?

And when the person asks, “How long will it take?” I know the conversation is done and all that’s left is the pleasantries (well, to be fair, I’m typically direct about what will happen if they don’t take action)  as I prepare to leave the meeting.

Here’s the deal: Whatever shape your life, team, organization is in, you didn’t just arrive there this morning; you developed the habits and behaviors and embedded the thinking that have all conspired to get you to where you are today over the course of many (MANY!) years. Unlearning those habits, challenging those beliefs, and changing one’s thinking will not happen overnight (even if I do have my magic wand with me!). It takes time; sometimes more and sometimes less, depending on the level of discomfort, desire to change, willingness to challenge thinking and beliefs, willingness to rock the boat, even.

Whether I say it will take six months, twelve months, or longer, consider this: That time will pass either way, whether you do the work or not; it’s inevitable. The choice is yours: Will you step out of your comfort zone, take the action, and work through the process? Or will you simply be another six months or a year older, and still living in the same proverbial place?

What will you decide?

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Yes, this was me, some months ago. My stylist actually called in sick twice in one week…the first time, the salon called to let me know, and rescheduled me for a couple of days later. I showed up early and waited nearly 30 minutes (there was no receptionist on duty — just stylists all with clients) before someone decided to tell me he’d called in sick, again.

I was so frustrated and upset, I was nearly in tears, but it’s not what you think. And, it’s not uncommon. I’ve heard similar stories from many of the women in my inner circle — and extended network — on numerous occasions.

It wasn’t actually about the haircut. The root of the issue (no pun intended) is this: As usual, I had a lot going on in my life, and had waited until my hair was truly out of shape, out of style, and just downright unruly before I’d called to make an appointment, which meant about another 10 days before I could actually get into the salon. It’s not as if I wasn’t aware that within a certain number of weeks of my last cut, that my hair would have grown and would need some professional attention. The issue was I had chosen to put my needs last, after my family, my business, my personal growth, etc…Commendable, maybe, but not conducive to peace or good mental health over time.

I was so looking forward to an hour of true down time, when someone else would be fully focused on me and my only responsibility was to sit upright in the chair; at that point, I needed that. So, when I finally took the time for myself and the stylist didn’t show up, I was at the end of my emotional reserves!

Ladies, tell me you haven’t been there…whether it was your hair stylist, nail technician, massage therapist, or a girlfriend you were planning to have coffee or lunch with…The stars were no longer in alignment and that respite you so desperately needed evaporated nearly in an instant, leaving you frustrated, emotional…whatever the reaction, it was likely out of proportion to the actual event.

This is one of the reasons I’m collaborating with Tracy Worley and Maureen Craig McIntosh to bring you Gracebreak Retreat. We are taking an intentional time out to reconnect with ourselves and other strong, talented, courageous women. We will discover our natural talents (potential) and strengths (performance), define or refine our core values, dig into the choices we make and the behaviors we demonstrate that either serve us or don’t! And we’ll connect with other women who share similar challenges in their lives, broadening and strengthening our inner circles and support network. And we’re doing this just outside of beautiful Bozeman, Montana.

Ask yourself these questions:

  • Do I routinely commit to things I really don’t have time for, or do not have deep meaning for me?
  • Do I routinely put everyone else’s needs before mine?
  • When I do take time out for myself, is it usually accidental (unplanned), late at night after everyone else is asleep, or simply because I’m desperate (and then I feel guilty for taking it)?
  • When was the last time I truly took significant time out to reconnect with and nurture my own needs?

If you answered yes to any (or all) of the first three, and you need to look at a calendar or have someone give you the answer to the last one, you need to be there with us. We’ve designed this retreat specifically for you. The truth is, you cannot give what you do not have and when your reserves run dry, you are of no service to anyone, especially you!

We can’t wait to see, and serve, you there! Register today!

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I want to add value to you in 2014, and I hope to do that in a number of ways. To begin, I want to offer you my e-book, The ‘What Matters Most’ Manifesto, available on Amazon.

I wish for you a meaningful, satisfying, and fulfilling year ahead, and that won’t happen by chance. You must be intentional about it…and this e-book is intended to get you in that mindset.

This short, easy read is yours for free on January 2 and 3, as a Kindle download.

This doesn’t mean you have to own a Kindle, you merely need a Kindle reader, which you can use on a smart phone or tablet (I use it on both my iPhone and my iPad).

Feel free to pass it along and share with others, as well.

Please be kind enough to review the book on Amazon when you’re done. I truly want to know what you think of it.

May you enjoy good health and much prosperity in 2014.http://www.amazon.com/What-Matters-Most-Manifesto-ebook/dp/B00GTXGX6W/ref=sr_1_1?s=digital-text&ie=UTF8&qid=1388595713&sr=1-1&keywords=laura+prisc

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This week, we are going to focus on how we can capitalize on opportunities.

As I sat down to write today’s blog post, I was reminded of a story I read last night about Miley Cyrus and the recent “events” in her life. I need to preface this by saying, I don’t follow her career, don’t condone her behavior, or agree with what she appears to be doing. I know enough of her life to know she is Billy Ray Cyrus’ daughter, used to be a young girl sensation as Hannah Montana, and now is apparently dead set on making herself over in a completely new image.

When I would hear some of the stories of her recent behavior (and who could have missed some of those stories?!), I thought, “Oh my goodness! She must not be thinking about what she’s doing and the potential implications and consequences of her behavior!” Frankly, I thought she was yet another public train wreck — another young person thrust into the spotlight and dysfunction that comes with that kind of celebrity when one is too immature to understand and deal with it in healthy ways. But, if the article I read last night (a recent issue of Entertainment Weekly, following her episode as host of SNL) is accurate, my initial perception of her is dead wrong.

She shared with the writer that, in fact, what she had been hoping would happen following her performance on the music awards show is exactly what is happening! She noted that while it’s clearly more than a month since the music awards show, people are still spending a lot of time and energy talking about her, her performance, the controversy, and her music. In fact, the cycle continues to churn with new stories popping up, a couple of “open letters” from Sinead O’Connor, etc…Then she appears on SNL, making fun of herself, and spoofing others in the skits, and not in a pathetic, clownish performance. She says her most recent album (dating myself, aren’t I?!) is getting lots of play…and she commented that she knew exactly what had happened to Hannah Montana, “She was murdered!”

Clearly, this last comment is her telling the world that she has deliberately shed the innocent young girl persona and is ready to take on the world in this new, very sexual and very risque new version of who she is at this time.

The result, lots of air time in a lot of forums…lots of discussion…and more opportunities for exposure. Perhaps she’s not entirely a train wreck? She sounds as if she is indeed a shrewd young woman with a plan (a strategy) propelling herself forward. This is not to say that she will be entirely successful in achieving all she dreams of; only time will tell. But, for the moment anyway, this young woman has a strategy and she is executing against it.

So how does this apply to us? As leaders, it behooves us to have a strategy clearly mapped out and to rehearse them in our minds prior to executing them. This gives us the opportunity to operate at a higher level of awareness, which, in turn, allows us to be more intentional in our words and actions as we work to propel ourselves, our teams, and our organizations forward, as well.

What opportunity is in your near future? In what ways could preparing give you every advantage as you move forward?

As Charles de Gaulle said,

You have to be fast on your feet and adaptive or else a strategy is useless!

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Good morning and Happy Thursday!

Time to get your journals out. Today, spend some time writing about what choices you need to make regarding a challenge or decision that you are currently facing.

Envision the obstacles you might face on your journey. Write them out.

Imagine how you will overcome those obstacles. Do this with the belief you are creative, resourceful, and whole; truly the only thing standing in your way is you…and any perceived obstacles can be defeated!

Now, spend some time putting together an action plan with specific measurable steps. Map it out in your calendar, and block out whatever time is necessary to do the work.

Find an accountability partner if it will help you stay on track.

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As you may remember, I recently went through a growth process called The Deeper Path; a coaching process facilitated by my colleague and mentor, Kary Oberbrunner. Part of the premise of this process is that for one to grow and realize one’s potential, we must embrace acute pain to end chronic pain in the various areas of our lives that aren’t working.

Today, spend some time in reflection with your journal. Take some time to think about the present path you are on in your life. What pain are you experiencing?

What’s not working?

What adjustments do you need to make to position yourself for success?

What three things do you desire to happen in your life over the next year?

What obstacles do you face in achieving these goals?

What changes do you need to make in your thinking and approach in order to get there?

Once you’ve spent some time identifying these things, take some time to map our an action plan for moving forward — starting today.

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You know what’s coming next, don’t you? Now that you have three people identified who share your values and may be capable of carrying on your legacy, it’s time to take action.

Today, meet with one of the people you’d like to invest in and begin to develop an action plan for intentionally developing him/her…think about relationship building, what training and mentoring they might need, what kinds of experiences do they need to have, and how you can instill your vision in them. What steps do you need to take to help them understand your vision and help prepare them to carry on your legacy?

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I’ve been thinking about this for a few weeks now. Originally, my thought was “are you hitchhiking through your life?” But as I thought about hitchhiking, it didn’t make as much sense.

You see, hitchhikers often have a specific destination in mind, as they step out onto the road and stick out their thumbs, or hold up their sign about where they want to go. And they accept rides with folks, usually headed in the same direction…getting at least a few miles closer to their chosen destination. But, truly, they are pretty much at the mercy (in more ways than one) of whomever’s car/truck they climb into when they accept a ride. Meaning, they may get closer to where they want to go, or they may just get farther away from where they want to get away from…and may simply end up wherever the driver happens to be heading.

What spurred this line of thinking was a number of conversations with people in recent weeks — some of whom I work with in coaching or mentoring relationships — about where they are headed in their careers. One conversation with a young woman about 3 weeks ago, really brought this idea into the front of my thinking. I worked with her, planning an event, and asked her how long she thought she would stay in event planning. (As an aside, if you’ve never been in this line of work, it’s very stressful — being responsible for a lot of details to pull events together, when often times you have little to no control over many of the pieces required for your event to be a success. And event planners often do not allow themselves to actually enjoy the event they have exchanged so much of their life energy to plan!)

She shared some thoughts on things going on in the organization she works with, and hopes to have the opportunity to move up, as her manager will be retiring in the next 12-18 months. She talked about her education and previous work experience and then said the thing that raised my alarms!

She said, there might be some opportunities in other departments of her organization, but that she would probably wait to see what the others above her thought she would be good at and what positions they might consider her for.

I said that was well and good, but wondered what she thought she was good at and what she was interested in…what was she striving to accomplish in her career? She seemed surprised by the question and it was obvious she’d not given it any thought, but said she probably should think about it.

I’m not sure why this particular conversation struck me so, as I have similar conversations with many people at a frighteningly frequent rate. I’m astonished by the people who give very little thought to what they want to do in life and are so willing to just go along for the ride, allowing someone else to define who they are, what they are good at, and what they should be doing with their time and life energy!

So, my question to you this evening is this: Are you the driver and navigator on your life’s journey, or are you just going along for the ride?

If you aren’t clear about what you long to do, are called to do, are passionate about doing, find satisfaction in doing…someone else will plan your life for you, but he’s the scary part: What they plan for you will be more focused on meeting their needs, not yours, and while you may be capable of doing certain things, and may even be quite good at doing them…they may leave you feeling empty, dissatisfied…Just because you “can” doesn’t always mean you “should.”

Clearly, the choice is yours. I encourage you to make this decision thoughtfully and intentionally. The answer is really the difference between choosing to be a victim or victorious, choosing to live your passion or just passing time helping someone else live theirs.

I look forward to hearing what you decide.

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As we are nearing the end of our month of exploring our passion, where do you want your passion to take you in your life?

Are you able to describe a a dream connected to your passion?

There’s a lot of power in getting it down on paper. Having recently gone through this process, with The Deeper Path Coaching Cohort I participated in, I can say it’s an eye-opning experience! If you allow yourself to really work through it, it can change the course of your future.

What role does your passion play in your personal and professional lives?

What effect do you want your passion to have on others?

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As you know, I’ve been preparing to roll out a new mentoring program, and the time has finally come! It is called Empowerment Mentoring, and it is designed to empower you to really focus on where you’re headed and what you need to do to design the life you want to lead and move — with greater self-awareness and intentionality — proactively into your future.

As you know, I’m really passionate about the work I do; there’s nothing more energizing and exciting to me than working with and seeing people like you experience the life-changing “aha!” moments, gain new insights, reach new levels of understanding, and see your life — and its many possibilities — in new ways.

Empowerment Mentoring is a powerful program, and your life will not be the same once you get started.

Join me tomorrow night (Tuesday 14 May) at 7 PM EDT for this free orientation call. I will give you a preview of the material through a 15-minute teaching on the Purpose, Vision, Goals lesson. I will provide an overview of how the program will work, and answer any questions you might have.

I will also, this one time only, extend the discount I offered last week. If you participate in this orientation call and enroll in the program by midnight (EDT) 15 May, you may register for $597 for the full six-month program. I offer a 30-day money back guarantee, so what do you have to lose?
Here is the dial-in information:
Code 569934

This is through Freeconferencing.com; if you dial from a landline, you may be subject to long-distance charges; if you dial from a cell, you may be subject to minutes charges (obviously, this depends on what kind of phone plans you have). This call will be recorded. If you aren’t able to attend the orientation call, but want to listen, send me a note and I’ll send you a link.

You may call through Skype, following these instructions:

  • Log-in to Skype
  • Select menu option “Contacts/Add Contact”
  • Add the SKYPE name: freeconferencing.5597261200 as the contact name
  • Select “CALL” button to begin dialing. To show the dial pad on Skype, click on “call” in the top menu bar and “show dial pad” or select the dial pad located in the bottom menu bar below dialing screen
  • You will need to enter the access code

NOTE: There is a risk in using Skype in that calls are sometimes dropped (less likely if you pay for Skype premium).

Please share this invitation with anyone you think might be interested!

I look forward to “seeing” you on the call tomorrow night at 7.

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