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Posts Tagged ‘Self-Awareness’

I spent some time reflecting on today’s blog post about a time when someone disagreed with something I am passionate about. I can say this has actually happened to me many times throughout the course of my career.

As you will have figured out by reading anything on my web site, any blog post, I am passionate about developing myself and others. I typically think of the impacts on people when I’m working with change, decision making, etc. And over the course of my career, working in the corporate world including many manufacturing companies, I was usually in the minority with respect to my focus and perspective. It put me in the position of often presenting an opposing view in an arena full of financial people, manufacturing/operations people, engineers, and production workers.

You see, I believe if we invest in people — take good care of them — they will take great care of our businesses. Engaged employees are more productive, more reliable, more creative, more loyal. But often times, companies don’t devise good measures for those attributes, can’t see how it impacts the bottom line.

In addition, I consider that in any endeavor, I am exchanging my time and life energy for something else, as are all the other people on this planet. For me, that exchange better be fulfilling, better be worth it. I know I make some people uncomfortable when I talk about it this way. A lot of people I am in contact with in work situations are just there for the paycheck, putting in their time, wanting to get out to get to their “real life.” I don’t want to live that way. I want meaning in my life, deep connections, the opportunity to add value and make a difference; I want my time and energy to matter.

I was once working with a group of people (not a “team” by my definition) who demonstrated a lot of behaviors I would consider unproductive, unhealthy, and in direct conflict with what they said they were there to do, which was work as a team. Communication was not flowing smoothly. Trust issues were evident and talked about frequently inside and outside the group — but never between the specific individuals involved in the situations being discussed. Processes weren’t followed consistently. They didn’t have a “lessons learned” process for evaluating job evolutions so they could learn from what went well and what didn’t and apply it to future work.

I offered to facilitate some team building for them; as my passion would direct me to, I wanted them to have a healthier environment to work in, better relationships with each other, the ability to have those uncomfortable, difficult, but necessary conversations, to perform at a higher level. I could envision a better culture, actual team work…They weren’t interested. Thought what I had to offer was fluff! In fact, they believed they had a healthy functional team and everything was fine.

I didn’t take it personally. I understand not everyone shares my perspective and my passion. Can I say it didn’t affect our working relationship? I don’t think so. Although, I will say I was less tolerant of listening to some of the issues they wanted to discuss about how others on their “team” were behaving. You see, if there’s an issue that’s disruptive enough to cause you to spend time thinking and talking (complaining) about it but you choose to not do anything to change it, that’s your choice.

My choice is to focus on what I can influence and effect positive change when I need it in my life, my team, my environment.

What about you?

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As you know, I’ve been preparing to roll out a new mentoring program, and the time has finally come! It is called Empowerment Mentoring, and it is designed to empower you to really focus on where you’re headed and what you need to do to design the life you want to lead and move — with greater self-awareness and intentionality — proactively into your future.

As you know, I’m really passionate about the work I do; there’s nothing more energizing and exciting to me than working with and seeing people like you experience the life-changing “aha!” moments, gain new insights, reach new levels of understanding, and see your life — and its many possibilities — in new ways.

Empowerment Mentoring is a powerful program, and your life will not be the same once you get started.

Join me tomorrow night (Tuesday 14 May) at 7 PM EDT for this free orientation call. I will give you a preview of the material through a 15-minute teaching on the Purpose, Vision, Goals lesson. I will provide an overview of how the program will work, and answer any questions you might have.

I will also, this one time only, extend the discount I offered last week. If you participate in this orientation call and enroll in the program by midnight (EDT) 15 May, you may register for $597 for the full six-month program. I offer a 30-day money back guarantee, so what do you have to lose?
Here is the dial-in information:
559-726-1200
Code 569934

This is through Freeconferencing.com; if you dial from a landline, you may be subject to long-distance charges; if you dial from a cell, you may be subject to minutes charges (obviously, this depends on what kind of phone plans you have). This call will be recorded. If you aren’t able to attend the orientation call, but want to listen, send me a note and I’ll send you a link.

You may call through Skype, following these instructions:

  • Log-in to Skype
  • Select menu option “Contacts/Add Contact”
  • Add the SKYPE name: freeconferencing.5597261200 as the contact name
  • Select “CALL” button to begin dialing. To show the dial pad on Skype, click on “call” in the top menu bar and “show dial pad” or select the dial pad located in the bottom menu bar below dialing screen
  • You will need to enter the access code

NOTE: There is a risk in using Skype in that calls are sometimes dropped (less likely if you pay for Skype premium).

Please share this invitation with anyone you think might be interested!

I look forward to “seeing” you on the call tomorrow night at 7.

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Take a few moments, today, to describe what your life could be like if you lived out your passions each day.

What would that do in your life and the lives of others?

What effect could passion have on your leadership?

I’ve been working on painting this picture for myself, through The Deeper Path Coaching Cohort I was participating in. I have authored my OPUS (what my life’s masterpiece will be…) and am working on the refining touches. I will share it with you soon.

All I can say is, having this level of clarity about my passion and focus is both unsettling and exciting. Unsettling because I never thought this intently about what I wanted my life to be life, and it’s an intense process to go through. Exciting because having such clarity makes it ever so much easier to say yes or no to opportunities that arise, without a lot of contemplation.

And, I can say with certainty, that when I am working in my passion, people notice. I was blessed to have the opportunity to give a keynote presentation at a women’s leadership luncheon last week. One of the participants shared this feedback with me: “You were awesome. Your passion is palpable.” I’m thankful it’s so obvious!

Is yours?

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Today, pick an activity linked to your passion in your personal life.

Schedule a time in the next week to live out your personal passion. Describe, in detail, what you will do. What does it look like, feel like, sound like? Who is there with you? Paint a vivid picture!

Also, pick an activity linked to your passion in your professional life. How can you live out that passion today?

What will that look like, feel like sound like? Who will be there with you?

Make time today to enjoy your passions…if you don’t, tomorrow will be here before you know it, and you won’t ever have this exact opportunity, again!

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I’ve been a professional communicator for 20+ years. I was fortunate to have the opportunity to explore nearly every aspect of corporate communications over the course of my career: Advertising, marketing, public relations, community relations, media relations, fund-raising, and internal communications. Having worked my way through all of those audiences, I was most interested in internal communications. In fact, for some time, you could say it was my passion — at least in terms of work.

You see, I’ve long believed that if you take good care of your employees, they will take great care of your business. So, they have always been my primary audience, and certainly first priority in any communication effort. However, over time, I lost interest in being the tactical communicator, and refocused my efforts on teaching my colleagues to become more competent, confident communicators themselves. I’ve been moving in the direction of developing others for a long time, and was moving down that path before I realized where it was leading me.

I’ve since been fortunate enough to have the epiphany about my true passion in life! Yes, I do still believe in taking care of one’s employees and that they will take care of your business; that hasn’t changed. But my beliefs about that have expanded enormously. It goes far beyond just communicating with them; it’s about developing them, helping them recognize and reach their potential.

Today, I can tell you my passion is for development — mine and other’s. I am passionate about personal growth, leadership, effective communication, and building healthy, smart teams. This passion is so strong, it is nearly all consuming. I see opportunities for growth in nearly everyone and every situation I encounter. I am driven to work on these opportunities — pouring into others everything I am able to share, with a focus on adding value to others — nearly all the time.

In fact, it’s not work any more…pursuing this passion is my opportunity to create my life’s masterpiece; to be able to blur the line between work and leisure.

Have you wrestled with finding your true passion in life?

Take some time today to describe your journey of discovering your passion up to this point.

Follow your passion, and success will follow you. ~Arthur Buddhold

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What are you passionate about? Can you name your top three passions? Out of those three, which one are you most fervent about?

Was there a key event – a defining moment – or circumstance that ignited your passion?

Do you remember the Jarvik-7 Artificial Heart? It was invented by Robert Jarvik. Jarvik was the son of a physician, who worked with his dad as he grew up and had some interest in medicine, but seemed more interested in art. One of his defining moments, driving his passion for the design and development of artificial organs was the passing of his father, who had died of heart disease after having open-heart surgery.

Your defining may or may not be quite this dramatic, but often, there is one.   

When you live through your passion, what effect does it have on you in terms of confidence and energy?

Again, when we are truly passionate about something, we typically move into the “discretionary performance zone,” operating above and beyond the minimum, to be sure, and often significantly higher than 100% effort!

Are you currently in a place where you get to live your passion each day?

If yes, describe how it is…

If no, describe why not.

 

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IMG_0165Several months ago, I participated in a Mastermind Group / Book Club exercise with some people from an organization I belong to called Outside Counsel. The books was What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith. I loved it!

Goldsmith describes 20 behaviors that cause people to get stuck in their careers (although work life is really the focus on the book, Goldsmith acknowledges these behaviors permeate all aspects of a person’s life), even though the behaviors may have actually served the person well at an earlier point in his/her life.

This made a lot of sense to me, as I have lived it. I grew up in circumstances that drove me to become a very self-sufficient, independent, over achiever. I did everything myself, not expecting or accepting help from others, because I had learned — from experience — that you couldn’t necessarily count on others to be there when you needed them. The behaviors I built around these beliefs served me well for a long time in my younger years, and even for a while when I entered the working world after college.

I reached a point, however, when those behaviors no longer served me and, in fact, became destructive. You see, it’s not possible for one person to be completely self-sufficient, to be all things to all people, to be an expert in everything. And, frankly, it was exhausting!

I eventually went through some painful experiences that caused me to become more self-aware and to effect some significant changes in my life. I changed my thinking about needing other people, inviting them into my life and my work, asking for help, and understanding that the end result of working with others is much more than I can accomplish solo.

This is the foundation for a keynote presentation I gave today at the Mid-Ohio Valley Chamber of Commerce’s second annual Women in Leadership Luncheon. I used my story and intertwined it with the concepts Marshall Goldsmith so eloquently outlined in his book, and offered it to the ~160 attendees as a learning opportunity. It was truly the highlight of my week, so far. I have to admit, I’ve been looking forward to this day for some months now, as I felt so lucky when the Chamber’s Executive Director accepted my suggestion for using it as the theme for the luncheon.

I had a great time working with the luncheon’s planning committee; a diverse group of talented, creative, focused women who planned and presented a great day of learning and connecting opportunities for the business women of this area.

My intent was for each person to have at least one aha! moment, one new insight, a new perspective, and that when they left the conference center today, they could say without a doubt, “Attending this event was truly worth the six hours of my life that I spent on it today.” You see, I do strive to entertain people when I have the opportunity to speak, but more than that, I want to make people to think, to learn, to grow. I want to share something that will have changed someone’s life, even if in just a small way.

I hope I didn’t disappoint!

I encourage you to take a few minutes right now to think about your current “Here”…not your physical location, but where you are in your work, your learning, your relationships, your growth, your career. Then give some thought to the next “There” you long to get to. What will it take to get you there? What skills will you need to develop? What behaviors will you need to stop demonstrating? What behaviors will you need to cultivate?

Click here to see the newspaper coverage.

Please, share your stories!

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Today’s the day to spend some time with yourself, reflecting.

Answer the following questions to help you explore the results of focus:

Have you ever finished several separate mid-size tasks in succession to one another? What were they and what was accomplished in each one?

When you focused on and finished these tasks, what effect did it have on you, on others, and on your company or organization?

What influence or trust did you gain from your peers for finishing these tasks?

When you finish tasks well, how can that build trust with others and create momentum to open up future possibilities for you?

The quality of the time you spend on these questions will define the quality of your answers, which in turn will affect the quality of your results.

As always, you will get out what you put in!

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Step back in time, briefly, and think of a time when you were focused on a task and then became distracted. Now, get out your journal and write about what happened. Describe the circumstances and the factors that led to the distraction.

With this new level of awareness, what recurring factors easily distract you when working on tasks or projects? What are your top three most frequent reactions?

Awareness is the key, so now that you are thinking clearly about your most common distractions, you can develop a system that will allow you to manage them.

Depending on what your distractions are, your management system may be about starting some new behaviors, stopping some existing behaviors, or implementing new behaviors.

For example, if your distractions are emails, phone calls, and unexpected visitors, perhaps you could create a different environment for yourself to work in, uninterrupted. Log-out of your email. Turn off the ringer on your phone and/or send it straight to voice mail. Close your door — with a “Please do not disturb” sign on it.

I worked with someone once who used “traffic lights” on his office door to let his co-workers know if it was ok to enter his office. If the light was green, he was working on things that wouldn’t be negatively impacted by an interruption. When the light was yellow, he was interruptible if the issue was really important (he defined what that meant for him and his team). If the light was red, that meant he should be interrupted ONLY if there was imminent danger of death and destruction! Of course, this system took some educating within his team, to understand what the lights meant and how to determine if what they were about to interrupt him with was really important in the grand scheme of things, or was important only to them in that moment.

So, what is your plan for retaining your focus and dealing with common distractions? Develop a plan that will work for each of your most common distractions. Once you’ve mastered the top three, refocus your attention on the next most common distractions. Over time, you’ll be amazed at how much more focused you are and how much more control you have over how you spend your time, rather than how you may fall victim to distractions.

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It’s time to get your journal out. Take some time today to reflect on what you’ve learned this week, and especially about the benefits of focusing on and improving a specific skill. Consider, also, the affect on your relationship with the person (people?) you reached out to for help.

How could your efforts in sharpening your skills, and building stronger connections, impact your production and effectiveness at work? What’s the impact on the larger organization — beyond just your role and your team?

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